38.5 weeks pregnant musingsMar 14, 2023
As I sit here I am 38.5 weeks pregnant and what an experience it has been. A daily reminder that so much of life is out of our human control, and with this surrendering, I have learnt heaps. I have put down the lessons I have taken from this gifted experience. I hope some of them resonate with newly pregnant moms, and help you slow it down, absorb it more and taste the beauty of each day!
Lesson 1: The Silent ‘Smiler’
I was a witness to this unspoken acknowledgement of ‘motherhood’ from other women. Walking down the street behind my belly, generated this beautiful silent woman-to-woman moment- a smile, a greeting or a gentle tilt of her head. Almost as if she was greeting the little gift beneath my skin as well as me. It’s magical.
Lesson 2: Body Mindfulness
I became much more present in my body. I felt the baby more and more but I also realized that my colon got displaced, my boobs were often sore, my food often moved the wrong way (I suffered from BAD heartburn) and my feet look a little different at times. All of these changes made me arrive in my body. It is almost forced mindfulness.
Lesson 3: A Student of Humanness
I started to study human development. I became a student studying all the facets of my unborn child. I found reading so empowering. I was however careful and selective with what I read (not Dr. Google). I read stories about motherhood and birthing, I looked into cultural differences in bringing up kids. I followed an anatomy textbook of baby’s development (with my hubby in bed at night). All of this information has definitely enriched my 9-month journey.
Lesson 4: The Self-Love Surge
I become a lot kinder to myself. I nurtured myself more. It’s sad to admit that before I was pregnant I could be quite hard on myself. I now listen to and love my body more; I give it rest when it asks for it. I give it nourishing meals with awareness of goodness; I walk and sleep more; and I eat chocolate when it asks for chocolate, guilt free.
Lesson 5: The Power of Stem Cells
You hear about things like stem cells, delayed cord cutting and post natal depression and realize how modern medicine has changed the world. I researched the idea of stem cells for about 4 of the 9 months. Having lost my dad to a disease where stem cells had shown some hope, I knew I had to ensure we didn’t miss an opportunity. The potential that this future medicine and technology holds is massive and it can only continue to advance. We somehow found the money and will be collecting little ones cells at birth. I felt that I would regret not doing it much more than I would regret doing it.
Lesson 6: The Need for My Mom
I realized how badly I needed and wanted my mom’s attention from the minute I fell pregnant. She was me, with me onceJ I felt a sacred connection of trust that showed itself only once I started to prepare to become someone else’s mom. The awareness of this connection, made me feel super privileged to be someone’s mom. What a commitment that is to the whole human race!
Lesson 7: My Hero Husband
I felt deeply connected to my husband – more than ever before. He became my most powerful support and was present right by my side throughout the whole journey. I let my guard down completely – I became more primal and raw at times and I saw his mind being blown daily by my changing body – something he idolized (although I couldn’t believe it sometimes). I am carrying his new love.
Lesson 8: The Powerful Placenta
I realized the power of food daily. Certain foods would cause a ‘party in my womb’ in less than 60 seconds. Yes, it was chocolate. It gave me more proof as to why I have avoided certain things, like alcohol during my pregnancy. The placenta is pretty permeable! Baby really is exposed to all of what I eat. It’s amazing to witness.
Lesson 9: The Journey of Learning
I realized that I am just a human and that the journey I am on is just the beginning of a steep learning curve – filled with doubt, love, guilt, joy and a million other emotions (daily). I have decided that, the only rule is to do it my way- the way that works for me and my child (with my husband close by our sides). I choose to take a moment each day to remember who I am. This child has chosen me to be his or her mom. And that’s all that really matters.
May your pregnancy be a powerful lesson in loving yourself and your body, knowing that you are perfect and enough and more than capable of being the best mother to the little one who has chosen you!
Happy 9 months ahead fellow mamma xxx
Do you want to know more about Kelly's Inner Work Fertility Course. It was created in line with her own journey to motherhood, after battling unexplained infertility for 3 years!
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